The angels never cease to amaze me with their divine wisdom and guidance. I have found their words to not only be insightful but comforting in a time when there are moments you feel doubt, insecurity or uncertainty creep in to the depths of your psyche. We all have that one voice that speaks to us deep in our mind; you know the one I mean. I have often referred to that voice as my inner goblin, the voice of “OMG, we’re gonna die!” I laugh just thinking about it but all humor aside we all know that voice and as much as we hate to admit it, we listen to that voice quite often. For the sake of this writing piece, I am going to call my inner goblin ‘Shanna’. Yes, I gave her a name because it is important to identify whom I am speaking of and to whom I am addressing.
Shanna was very vocal this week; she was having a field day kicking around my confidence and sense of self-worth. There were moments when it was a constant battle between her field goals and my counter defenses. It was not until just this morning I was able to take her down and win the game. You see, I just recently launched my first YouTube channel and you can imagine the amount of anxiety and uncertainty that opportunity provided. It was a struggle for me to commit to uploading a blog and podcast weekly and now I have a YouTube channel. When the angels instructed me to begin a blog, they assured me that material would magically show up and they have yet to let me down. The same is true for my Podcast but when the word YouTube came up during a meditation I quickly began to second-guess myself.
Immediately I put my foot down but Metatron stood tall and firm on the decision. When I asked why the response I got was, “You are born to lead and the world needs your leadership.” It took me an entire four days to come to terms with the decision and without fail; I began my journey into YouTube land. So now, I can explain what Shanna has to do with all of this. Well, yesterday was editing and uploading day and before I could even begin to edit the video, the doubt began to sink in. The fear of not being accepted or worse ridiculed was clouding my judgement and confidence. My greatest fear is and was to not show up in this world and have people recognize who I am. When I realized this, a light bulb went off in my head.
Leadership has been something I personally have struggled with for years. If someone ever asked me if I saw myself as a leader, I would simply laugh. Yet, many of the people in my circle look to me for guidance and leadership. As I struggled yesterday, Metatron stepped up and asked, “When are you going to accept your role as a leader?” His question puzzled me so I responded with, “What do you mean. I’m doing what you asked me to do.” The conversation ended there and I continued editing and struggling with Shanna in the background. Fast-forward to the next morning, I am going through my routine of daily prayers and devotions and I pick up my oracle cards to draw a card of the day.As I begin to shuffle the deck out pops one card, ‘Wise Leadership’. As I sat and looked at the card, I realized that I had already seen and drawn the same card earlier in the week. I pulled out my journal and there it was my journal entry from three days prior. Clearly, I was not understanding or listening to the message.
As the realization hit me, Metatron showed up like magic. I began to ask myself some deeper questions, clearly questions I failed to ponder for fear of what it might mean and how it might affect me. It was not until right at that moment I realized that I could not see myself as the leader because I did not believe I was a leader. Being a leader meant having to lead the way, even in moments when I did not know where I was going or what I was doing. Leading others is scary and something I never wanted to do, yet here I am leading with my words, and interpretation of the angel’s guidance. I began to understand that being a leader does not necessarily mean others will follow; it simply means being a leader in your own life.
The angels and Metatron were trying to tell me to take ownership of my wants, and desires. Yes, I was given instruction and I was doing as I was told but the ultimate decision on where to go, what to do, and how to go about it was all mine to make. When spirit provides you with the guidance, it is given to you as a stepping-stone. It is simply to nudge you in the direction or your highest good. So now, I ask all of you… have you been asked to be a leader? Are you the leader of your own life? Many of us simply follow others when we are all born to lead. We each have the ability to lead our own lives and shape our own destiny.
Leadership is defined as, ‘the action of leading a group or people or organization.’ My definition of leadership is not to lead others, it is to inspire, motivate and encourage others to be who they are, and accept themselves just the way they are. Being the leader of your own life means, you need to show up and step into this world with a strong sense of self-worth, dignity and confidence. You need to believe in who you are and recognize that no one outside of you can change that. As I began to understand the angel’s message on wise leadership, I knew exactly what needed to happen with Shanna. You see, Shanna was simply acting out because she was afraid of not being a part of the team and she was bored. I quickly asked to speak to her and reassured her that as the leader of the project it was my duty to assign roles. I invited her to collaborate with me and if she wanted to help, she could. She now understands the importance of her role in my life. As for this new YouTube adventure, we are now working as a team.
Where do you need to step up and be a leader in your life? Do you have a ‘Shanna’ that needs some reassurance or guidance? If so, all you need to do is reassure him/her of their importance in your life. It is important to listen to those inner goblins because they are valid and have purpose and meaning. The angels want to say the following…